Your First Saturn Return Doesn’t Have to Break You — Here’s How to Rise Stronger

“What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.” — Nietzsche 

Saturn is our solar system’s disciplinarian planet. It’s associated with stern yet loving father energy, and it’s return is one of the most complex astrological phenomena in our lives.

But that doesn’t mean that it’ll be a terrible time that’ll leave you worse off. Saturn’s aim is to make you more resilient and mature forever.

My Own Experience with Saturn Return… In Case You’re Interested

If you don’t want to know what my own first return was like, no problem! Please just skip this bit. I’d just like to give you an example of what I think is a rather common experience during this transit.

So my first Saturn return was a little over a decade ago now. It was emotionally painful and embarrassing but I emerged more mature, more resilient, more independent and more grounded. Today, I can look back on that strange and highly emotional period and thank my lucky stars for it because I believe that it improved my life by leaps and bounds.

I don’t mind sharing a summary of what happened. It began when I was 27 when and I felt compelled to start dating again. At the time, nearly all of my friends were either in serious longterm relationships, married, or married with children and I felt left out.

It also felt like we were all in competition with each other to settle down. Like many young women, I felt enormous societal pressure to find someone, and some of my friends and family were actively adding to that pressure by constantly telling me that my time was running out to have kids.

After some months of unsuccessful online dating, I met someone at a party and we hit it off straight away. During our eight month romance, we travelled together, spent nearly every day after work together and shared our deepest thoughts, strangest opinions, and strongest wishes for the future with each other. I had finally met someone who I really liked, and who I thought really liked me.

One day, after a romantic night picnic on the beach, he asked me to marry him and I immediately accepted. I was absolutely over the moon but less than a fortnight later, he called me on his way to Ireland where he’d booked a weekend getaway for himself. “I thought you were the one, but you aren’t”, he casually declared. “Yeah, I’m just not really feeling it anymore”. This was all bizarre considering the night before last he seemed thrilled to be engaged.

He went on. “I think that for a woman, you’re just too tall, and men like a bit of meat on a woman’s bones, you know?”. You’re also pretty lazy, aren’t you? I mean, by now, you should have a proper job”. I had a freelance career at the time, which wasn’t hugely enjoyable or stable, but it granted me plenty of freedom and it paid the bills just fine.

In short, my self-confidence took a serious thrashing. I felt so embarrassed, stupid, ugly, and for the first time, a total loser with no prospects. I crumbled. I thought I was in love with him. I thought he was in love with me. How could he be so mean? How could be drop me like a hot potato after all those heartfelt moments we’d shared and after telling me that he’d been waiting for me all of his life? 

On top of all this, my aunt, who I was close to, had just been diagnosed with cancer, which he was aware of.

We never spoke again. In the months that followed, I couldn’t eat much. I lost a lot of weight and became anaemic. But I started to see an energy healer and I set myself on a path of healing for my own sake and the sake of my family.

After a year of regular Reiki, Spiritual Response Therapy and lots of snotty crying on various friends’ shoulders, I felt well again. My aunt got a lot better too. In fact, things drastically improved all round. I even landed myself some fancy, fresh clients.

It took me a full year but I finally realized that there was something up with him, not me. And I didn’t need to know what it was. And I didn’t care. His reasons for his behavior were valid to him, whatever they were. I also realized that people who discard others so effortlessly and carelessly probably aren’t worth mulling over too much.

From the whole experience, I learned to be more a bit more wary of others’ intentions generally, and I learned the importance of setting boundaries. I didn’t have healthy boundaries with him, and I was too open and giving in the connection. I began to value myself properly and balance the giving and taking with others.

I went on to have dates with other guys who were much more respectful because they sensed that my self-worth was in-tact. I think that in this world, most of us need to put in the work to ensure that others treat us fairly. I think that applies to all sorts of relationships whether they’re romantic, platonic or professional or whatever.

Ok, back to the article!

So What Does ‘Saturn Return’ Refer To Again Exactly?

Saturn return refers to the planet returning to the same ecliptic longitude as it was at the time of your birth. While this event peaks when you’re around 29 and a half, its influence can usually be felt in the run up to that age. So, from about 26 or 27. This is thanks to the planet moving quite slowly —it takes about 2.5 years to transit a sign.

You might be here precisely because you need an explanation for the changes that are currently happening in your life and the increased sense of maturity you feel. And if you’re about to pop into your 30s, you now know why you feel the way you do!

After the first return around at around 29, the next one will roll around in your late 50s, and the third one in your late 80s, if you’re still lucky enough to be on Earth by then. But the first return of this planet is the most intense and usually, the most life-altering.

What to Expect

I’ll make it clear that this astrological event is known for being TOUGH. Of course, this doesn’t mean that you’ll go through a really difficult breakup or that you’ll get fired or become homeless. The life lesson that play out for each of us are very different and yes, some people have gentler lessons that others!

This planet’s return brings a lot of energy focused on improving your life, rather than making it worse but sometimes, that means enduring a challenging lesson. And naturally, whatever it brings, effort will be required on your part to navigate it well and reap the benefits. 

But the good news is that by the end of it, or whenever you feel better and more sorted, you’ll be more aligned with your true self and understand your divine nature and purpose at a deeper level.

Here are the main things you can expect to experience during your first return…

Feeling The Need to Restructure Your Life

All of a sudden, you may feel this urge to get your life together, or change it up drastically. This could be triggered by a painful break-up or divorce, the death of someone close, or some other major life event. 

Or you may just feel the need to get more out of life, or place yourself on a better path.

This restructuring could include moving home, carrying out renovation work on your home, finding joy in being a single person, investing in a new career, or trying to settle down and start a family. 

Whatever form it surfaces in, ultimately, you’ll likely feel the need for more structure and more order in your life. In your late 20s, chances are you’re done with school but you might feel compelled to studying something new, or further your studies, for instance, with a master’s degree.

This return could help you pinpoint what’s missing in your life, and what you need to do to mature and/or make your life better. And you can reach an impressive development level and balance if you listen to the guidance of this disciplinarian planet.

You’ll Feel More Responsible

Responsibility starts to make its presence known in your life. Normally, this happens in one’s late 20s anyway but you may decide to rely more on yourself. This doesn’t necessarily mean that all of a sudden you’ll be doing everything alone, though. It can mean that you’ll just begin to take on the type of responsibility that leads to an independent life.

You’ll Develop a More Mature Approach to Life

This period seems to activates your maturity gene. You may find yourself starting to look at life through a wiser filter that allows you to make better, more adult decisions. This increase in maturity goes hand in hand with the increased sense of responsibility you may be feeling. Both will help you to become the person you were meant to be as an adult.

A Deeper Understanding of Life on Earth (and Everything in it)

If you’re an introspective type of person to begin with, you may just start looking beyond the surface and identify the root cause of each problem.

You might also find it easier to understand others. During this period, your relationships may become more heavily based on values like empathy, profound connection, mutual understanding, and the desire to help others and humanity at large somehow.

Feeling More Certain About Who You Want to Be in Life

Knowing what our life purpose is can be difficult. It takes a lot of time and self-awareness to own our authenticity and go towards the best version of ourselves. Saturn gives us a push during its return phase, to get closer to our core energy and learn how to manifest it into the world. You understand what type of individual you want to be and start acting like them!

Karmic Implications

If your personal development journey has had its ups and downs, the parts that you’re less proud of will become important life lessons during this time. I want to stress the fact that Saturn doesn’t punish you for your past mistakes, though. On the contrary, it takes a past mistake and converts it into an opportunity for growth.

Learning from our mistakes is not often an easy process, but it is necessary to reach the best version of ourselves. Karma is NEVER punishment. It just provides helpful opportunities for learning and growth.

Suggested ‘Dos’ For This Time

Here are some of my personal suggestions to help you navigate this oftentimes intense period of transition:

Own Your Thoughts, Feelings and Actions

This planet wants you to own your authenticity. And this starts with owning your thoughts, emotions, and actions. It’s very important to be true to yourself and understand that we all do both good and bad things. Such is life as a human.

Start Meditating on Your Life

You can’t build anything of value if you don’t lay down a healthy foundation first. Look at your life objectively and decide what truthfully works and what doesn’t. Journaling can be a great way to get your thoughts in order.

Discipline Yourself

Remember that this planet calls for discipline and a sense of duty and commitment. This is the best time to fix your routine or start one from scratch because you’ll get all the support you need to maintain it. Wake up early, start working out, eat healthier, dedicate more time to your work and don’t forget about self-care. All these things that you start during this time should stick and lead you to becoming the best version of yourself!

Re-evaluate Your Relationships

This is a tough one but make sure you stay attached to the right people for the right reasons. This phase of your life will shake your connections up back and forth until you lose the things that no longer serve you and this might include some important people in your life. But you get extra credit if you’re wise enough to identify these unhealthy bonds yourself and free yourself of them.

Ask Yourself The Most Questions You Can Ever Ask

Look at yourself in the mirror or open your journal and start a conversation with yourself. Are you on the right career path? Are you in the right relationship or marriage? Do you live in the place you want? Is your life complete and if not, what’s missing? All these questions will help you know yourself more objectively and take the right steps moving forward.

Embrace Change With Open Arms

All the changes you go through during this time should have a positive outcome. So, focus on that when you feel like your world is being turned upside down because, was that even your world or one you created for yourself that keeps you stuck from who you truly are? Saturn can bring deep yet necessary changes and all you can do is embrace them with an open heart. Absorb all the knowledge and wisdom that comes with these changes and let them bring out your core values!

Suggested ‘Dont’s’ For This Time

Simply Go With the Flow

You want to own your life and become responsible for it, more than at any other time in your past. This means you’ll need to get in the driving seat and realize that you alone are in control of your thoughts and actions. And it’s up to you to make the most out of every opportunity. Once Saturn is done recalibrating your life and you know that you’re on the right track, you can go with the flow and let things run their course.

Overindulge in Things that Aren’t Important

While this can be a difficult and overwhelming time, indulging in activities that don’t do much for your well-being to help you forget about your struggles isn’t a solution. Take time to relax when you feel you need that but get right back on the track of rebuilding your life. You don’t have to go through this phase in a stressful manner but you have to give it the importance it deserves and use it to better your life through wisdom and maturity.

Your Life After…

I think it’s vital to bear in mind that this highly personal transit hits everyone differently. Some people aren’t affected much at all, others become forever changed.

Once your first Saturn return ends, you’ll discover a more stable and balanced version of yourself and you’ll love it! It is the energetic reset we all need when we enter adulthood, to get our lives on track and increase our odds of success on all levels! 

While the road to this type of balance can be bumpy, always remember that it’s an investment in your future self. The effects of this return will echo in your life for the next three decades and your main focus is to create a healthy start for the next phase in your life. Allow yourself to feel and experience this phase with a brave and open heart so you can live the life you’ve always wanted.